Why do people say if you want to cheat get a divorce, but if you leave your spouse you're still a jerk?

Is it really all that good to stay trapped in a loveless marriage just because people will have a witchhunt if you leave? Yeah, it hurts the spouse who still wants the marriage but you can't make yourself feel something you don't feel. So either way, one person is going to be miserable.Why do people say if you want to cheat get a divorce, but if you leave your spouse you're still a jerk?
You shouldn't get married if you are not mature enough to make a decision to stay with your partner. People don't just wake up one day completely out of love. It's a gradual process that requires nurturing. If you have been nurturing your dislike for your spouse over time, THAT is what makes you the bad guy. So whether you leave or cheat, it's still a matter of you turning your back on someone you vowed to be dedicated to for the rest of your life. If your partner is miserable, try getting them some help instead of leaving them. That's a good way to prevent yourself from falling out of love.Why do people say if you want to cheat get a divorce, but if you leave your spouse you're still a jerk?
Look it's all bad. But it is what happens when people jump into marriage for the wedding, or they grow apart over time, or they let themselves walk too close to the edge of the cliff and fall off the fidelity terra firma.





Yes, in any case, people are going to be unhappy, and people are going to talk, and people are going to keep on doing it.





But for those who play by the rules, and get married for all the right reasons, marriage is still the best of all worlds.
I think it is better to leave because at least your being honest and you know you still have your pride and less fuel on the fire for the divorce. My sister and brother in law just split and they didn't cheat just made an open decision to see others and they are both wild and having a lot of fun. They are happy people to be around now before it was misrable to even be around them. I guess you got to get it all out in the open if she/he can't handle the truth f it you walk away with your pride. Keep The higher ground
When a relationship ends, there always has to be a good guy and a bad guy. I don't know why, but that is just the way it is. I guess it makes the one that is hurting feel better to place the blame on someone other than themselves. Most people cannot admit that they might have contributed to the failed relationship and therefore place all the blame on the other person.
I don't think that's true. It's a fact of life that not all people can make a marriage work and being honest about that and moving on to make a new life is much more suitable and moral than finding something on the side. Getting caught in an affair and THEN getting a divorce... that's when the impression of jerk comes in.
Nobody wants a loveless marriage but you should try to reignite the love that was once there. Marriage takes lots and lots of hard work and selfless efforts. You must always put the other before you and so should they. There is not secret recipe for marriage but with Gods help it will survive.
All I know is life is too short to spend miserable. If you don't love your spouse and there is no chance at loving them again, let them go even if it 'breaks their heart'. I'm sure living in a loveless marriage breaks their heart far worse than you leaving will.
yeah, work on it first, and when all fails leave. Talk to your spouse about how you feel though. Don't let it get to the point and then come out of the blue waking up one day, when she/he is thinking everything's fine.
It shouldn't matter what other people think. They're on the outside looking in and have no clue what's really going on. Personally I would get a divorce and would go off on anyone else that butted in.
sounds like somthing some pissed off feminst


b*tch man hater would say just to make herself feel better





women are soo freakin screwed up
well to me...marriage is soposto be for ever and yes i would get hurt. But if you didn't cheat be for you asked her than i would say your a pretty good guy
your obviously a jerk and you will still be even if you stay...just leave and let the poor lady move on.
I wouldn't say you were a jerk! I agree you should leave, I would rather you leave then cheat!
As the spouse that was left, I can say for sure that the misery goes away. I ended up MUCH happier after he was gone.
jerk=cheating on spouse





better to get a divorce than cheat