How would you react if you just found out that your spouse had an affair 12 yrs ago?

And you just now found out about it.How would you react if you just found out that your spouse had an affair 12 yrs ago?
It would depend on how you found out, why you found out. Are there issues at home that prompted this discussion? I think that if there are other underlying issues at home and this was the icing on the cake to seal your decision for a divorce, then I would say go for it.





I'm sorry this has happened. If you need to talk, please let me know.How would you react if you just found out that your spouse had an affair 12 yrs ago?
It would depend on how I found out and how long it lasted and the circumstances surrounding the affair. If he confessed, I don't think I could throw away the subsequent 12 years plus any time before that. If someone outed him (say, asking for child support), then I'd have a problem. If it was a one night thing, I'd forget it--he probably does not even remember her name/what she looked like. If it was an actual relationship, then I'd have a problem. But, then, I'd remember that he chose to stay with me. But, I'd go to counselling.
It sure wouldn't make me a bit happy! Was it a long going affair or rather a ';fling'; type thing? Now you're no doubt going to ';wonder'; at some of the things he's done in the past %26amp; think IF it could have been done more than that one time! I can imagine how you must felt tho. As long as it doesn't happen again, that's the most important thing. That was a long time ago tho %26amp; it sure was kept ';well hidden'; all these yrs. that's for sure. Just try your best to keep it in the past %26amp; leave it there. Keep going forward %26amp; trust you NEVER have to worry about anything like this happening again. I for one would NOT be happy to learn of this tho, %26amp; can imagine how you feel. I too had a cheater, but mine was an on going thing, that's why I call him my ';ex';. I will NOT ever accept the unacceptable again. Best to you...:)
How did you find out about it? Did he tell you? Did the women tell you. If he told you because he wanted ';no secrets'; between the two of you, he is a selfish jerk. He should have lived with the guilt the rest of his life. Karma is a b*tch.





If the women told ya, then I would ask myself why she waited so long? Are they picking up where they left off??
I would be floored! Completely destroyed. I guess I'd have to hear his side of the story and think back and put some pieces of the puzzle together...I am thinking it would, at the very least, warrant some therapy. Yikes!
I would be pissed and I would want to know why and the circumstances (how long it lasted, etc.) behind it...depending on those details I may or may not forgive him...~*Good Luck*~
honestly, i don't know how i'd react. i'm sure there would be shock, disbelief and hurt but i don't know to what extent
12 yrs ago? I would ask for the details and enjoy the story.
I would probably forgive him if it were a one time thing. 12 years is along time, no sense in being mad NOW.
either forgive or drop him, either way the two of you have a lot to talk about.
12 years is a long time ago. Get over it.
Move out
he is wrong... u shouldn't be living with a cheater...